Friday, March 22, 2013

Revenge vs Karma

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I had revenge dreams last night. Actually they were more like dreams of Karma. I have thoughts of revenge all of the time but I never act on them as they usually backfire. I believe in Karma. People get what they deserve. i may never know about it because it can take a while and people are good at hiding things. It’s like those perfect families you see on the news who are on the news because they had a severe meltdown.

In my dreams last night the Man was caught out in all of his misdeeds and everyone told him he got caught because he got rid of his voice of reason.

A packeted mall and a huge maze like castle featured as settings. I love when big stone castles are in my dreams. It is so much fun running around in them hiding and escaping from the bad guys trying to get me. I had a hot, fun boy friend too which was a new twist and one I liked. I’m going to request this feature in future dreams.

The vendor I spoke of yesterday who tracked me down at home called me to let me know how much he misses working with me. He told me what a great job I always did. He offered to be a reference when I start seriously looking for work.

I talked to another vendor I worked with who offered to keep her ears open and refer me to any of her clients that may need my skills.

These folks were always very helpful and have made me feel very good.

My father came home from the hospital yesterday. I got him and my mother all settled in, gt his prescription, her bleach and left to the sounds of my mother bitching at my father. Everything is getting back to normal. This morning I have to take them to his doctor’s appointment at 09.00 to get his catheter removed (hopefully) and then maybe my life can get back on track. I’ve been making notes in between trips to the hospital and my mother complaining about my large purse and not paying attention to her but that’s not particularly satisfying. I need several hours of uninterrupted writing time or I may burst into flames.

April is a week away and I am beginning to have a nervous breakdown whenever I think about doing my resume and picking a new job. I am getting so much pressure from people to go get a “job.” Few people understood my need to take March to regroup. And it turns out I did not have as much time as I thought I would have as great chunks of time were used for family obligations to which I could not say no. No wonder artists make such poor family members. You have to be really selfish to get anything done. I have to be more selfish. I want a writing career, damn it. I do. I really, really do!