Monday, September 23, 2013

Comfort is an Illusion

vanessa v kilmer (c) 199504

mindlovemisery wants us to step out of our comfort zones this week 
and do something we haven't done before. 
I don't sing. When I was in fifth grade,
my choir teacher threw me out of our school's singing group 
because I laughed during rehearsals 
and I've never been the same since. 
So, if you want to chance bleeding ears, 
you can hear me sing my favorite song "Amazing Grace."

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Flash 55 - Round Red Robin 0001

Round Red Robin watched the clock flip to O-two-hundred hours then his forehead struck the top of the sticky bar. Every year, he wanted to drink enough to help him forget Juli’s death but he never did.

The bartender rousted him. Robin mouthed off, got punched in the teeth and thrown out on his ass.


so Purdie Pyrate had to get involved.

~ click image to make biggerer ~

Monday, September 16, 2013


The Codes

This post is for prompt 21 at mindlovemisery. The subject is My Story and we are to answer a question of our choosing. I’m asking, “From where does my love/hate response come?”

READER WARNING - The link at the end of this piece does not go to a happy place so beware.

My Story 

I had a dog. I’m not referring to the dog I have now; not the dog in the picture above. I’m talking about a dog I had as a young child when we lived in Fayetteville, North Carolina where my brother was born. This was during the time when I was still unbroken, still whole, still my genuine self.

I don’t remember this dog. I don’t know her name. What I know of her comes from brief stories my parents told me about her. She was a Cocker Spaniel. I’m guessing this is why I think this breed is so cute and happy. When I see one of these dogs, I get a warm and fuzzy feeling that I find disproportionate to the current moment and quite disconcerting.

At four, I would burst through the front door, knocking into my dog so that she would tumble away from me across the floor. Laughing, I’d chase her, scoop her close to my little body and hug her tight. We’d sit together in mutual, innocent joy.

Most dogs make me uncomfortable. During this same time period, one of our neighbors had a German Sheppard. I remember it being so much bigger than me. It looms in my memory as an all consuming monster; a Cerberus in my nightmares. It rose up, put a paw on each of my shoulders, sniffed my face then bit me on the cheek. Large dogs always get my blood pumping and my adrenaline flowing from fear.

So, like most things for me, dogs are part of the ongoing push-me-pull-me relationship I have life’s experiences.

My parents got rid of my dog when my father’s orders sent him to Germany. My mother, brother and I followed him to Frankfurt where I lost myself.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Flash 55 - τρεισκαίδεκα

"13" sketch mechanical pencil on printer paper ~ vanessa v kilmer (c) 20130913

It’s hard to find shoes that fit when you have thirteen toes: six on the left, seven on the right. Cinderella’s stepsisters had it good compared to me. They cut off their heels and toes to get a prince; to move up in the world. I had to cut off three toes to comfortably move.

Friday, September 06, 2013

Flash 55 - Where Do We Go From Here?

~uniball VISION pen with blue ink on copy paper in ZENTANGLE style~
~"The SPOT" by vanessa v kilmer (c) 20130905~

She drew in her sword, scraping the wooden floor.

The sirens were getting louder.

I led her around the bloody body and up to the roof.

Her damaged wings healed as she unfurled them and lifted her into the night sky. She glanced back, tears in her eyes as she disappeared into the clouds. Angels...

Time to play with the G-Man folks.

Thursday, September 05, 2013

Thursday 13 - excerpt

 Himalayan salt crystal

“Do you like it when I hit you?” he screamed in Mary’s face.

~ Thirteen words I wrote yesterday for The Salt Lovers' Book of Magic

Sunday, September 01, 2013

"F" Food

opaque watercolor on pressboard
July, 2009

“F” Food

Food is fuel.
Food is fun.
Food is flavorful.
Food can be fattening.
Food can be fatal.
Food can be frightening.
Food is family.
Food is a fiesta.
Food is fabulous.
Food is filling.
Food is feeling.
Food is fault.
Food is faithless.
Food is familiar.
Food can be a fad.
Lack of food can make you fade.
Too much food can make you fade.
Food can be a friend.
Food can be a fiend.
Food finds me feverishly looking for freedom.
Food is fuel.


a woman tried to do her wifely deed
by making a fresh batch of mead
she made it quite strong
which might have been wrong
since her hubby fell from his steed

You Can Play Limerick-Off Monday Here

Rabbit, Rabbit - September

~click to make image biggerer~

Don't be too hard on yourself 
if you need some 
artificial courage this month. 

Courage doesn't always roar.  Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow. ~ Mary Anne Radmacher

Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow. ~ Dan Rather

Have the courage to live.  ~ Robert Cody