Tuesday, April 25, 2006

High School Reunion

Again, when I was fifteen and a senior, I walked to high school in the wee hours of the morning. We had a very large school population. My graduating class had 1,100 students and yes, this was a suburban high school. So, we had split shifts. The seniors went to school in the morning, until 11:30am, then the sophomores and juniors went from 12:30pm on.

So, one morning, as I’m walking to school, a car pulls up next to me and the guy behind the wheel rolls down his passenger side window.

“Can you mumble, mumble?”

I walked over closer to the car so I can hear him better. I was raised to be polite to strangers in need.

“Can you tell me how to get to the Plaza?”

“Sure.” Big smile on my face. I told you I was raised to be polite to strangers. “Go to the end of this street and turn left.”

He had a big smile, too. His mom must have raised him right, also.

“Follow that road and it will be on your right. Can’t miss it.”

“Do you need a ride?”

“Oh, no thank-you,” I said, stepping away from his car.

“OK. If you’re sure?”

“Yes, thanks, anyway.” OK, you can leave now. I moved back onto the sidewalk.

“Well, all right. Thanks for your help.”

It wasn’t until he pulled away that I realized he had his dick out of his pants and he was jacking off the whole time I was giving him directions.


  1. Oh my god. Men can be so fucking nasty sometimes. That just makes me want to go on a shooting spree.

  2. Should this situation arise (hah, sorry) again, it's always good to remember Bernadette Peter's line (I think from Pink Cadillac): "Looks like a penis, but smaller."

  3. I would say, what an asshole (although that is not the portion of anatomy he exposed). Oh what the hell:

    WHAT A FRIGGING ASSHOLE! (Pardon my French)

    OK, my favourite exposure story was of this guy who used to pull out his dick at the schoolgirls who used to come in through the backgate of my school (this was years before I was born and the school in question is a Convent, haha). OK, that bit's not funny. What's funny is that one day he did it to the wrong girl. She caught his penis in an iron grip and proceeded to scream the place down. So the guy was caught with his pants down and his dick twisted in a vice like grip. Hahahahahahaha.

    When my Mom (who had been around at that time) told me about this, I fell all over the floor laughing. I also thought, wow, girls of that time (the 50s) had way more spunk than us.

  4. The weenie waver was an jerk like all those pathetic loser exhibitionists are..but jerk aren't exclusively of the male sex. For example jege (jen) makes the comment "That just wants to make me go on a shooting spree". Yeah right! Let's go out an shoot a bunch of innocent men because some wacko exposed himself to you decades ago! Just what we need...another mass murder by another nut case! Men AND women can be so fucking nasty sometimes!!!

  5. jege: One of my longest running fantasies is to climb a water tower with a high powered machine gun. Don't tell anyone.

    fury: Glad you're back. Sometimes I wish I had a clue, so I could get some good one liners, but alas, always too late.

    jenn: Great story. That should be a move taught in kindergarten.

    anon: "weener waver" - good one. I'd defend jege's comment as just venting, but I think she might shoot me.

  6. anon: I was KIDDING/VENTING!!! Jesus fucking christ on a stick. Now I do want to shoot someone.

    But not you, Goldennib. :)

  7. Also, chickenshits who lash out at others under the guise of "anonymous" make me sick. Especially when they have an underdeveloped sense of humor and irony.

  8. Da bitches iz freakin out. Ya know what im sayin?

  9. Well, that's bitches for you, huh? Can't jerk off in front of them, can't call them psycho.

  10. jege: I think in future you should follow your joking shooting comments with "just kidding" and when you are not just kidding, just shoot (you know where to aim.)

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  12. Yeah talking about going on a mass killing spree has always seemed pretty funny to me too. That guy just ain't got no sense of humor jege. Ma shita! You go girlfriend!

  13. Wonder if you women would see the humor if some guy made the same comment (even jokingly) about shooting a bunch of women because he got outraged over some relatively minor long ago incident. Think I know the answer to that one!

  14. Jim, Sometimes humor & irony is the only way to cope with the perverted shit that this world can throw at us.

    Several years back, I was taking a walk with my young niece. As we crossed over a pedestrian bridge, some wacko jumped out in front of us, completely naked and jerking off. We turned and ran the other way, but I was just so mad at him for exposing himself to my niece. It's bad enough to do that to an adult, but to a little child, that type of thing is emotionally scarring. Later in life, my niece became sexually precocious at an early age, then was raped by her bus driver at 16. Currently, her self-esteem is nil, and she suffers from a wide variety of emotional problems. I can't say for sure that her early exposure to that pervert is the cause, but it sure couldn't have helped.

    Until recently, it was almost exclusively men who have done the sexual assaulting of children. It's a statistical fact, and that is why I made the comment about men being so fucking nasty sometimes. Adults (both men AND women) really need to realize that when they molest and/or expose children to sexual situations, they are fucking them up for life. And yes, I think they should be punished SEVERELY.

    Also Jim, I do not think that being prematurely exposed to a sexual situation is a minor incident. And whether the victim is male or female, the damage is the same.

    And when these victims take out their unbearable, overwhelming anger on society for the horrors they have suffered, then the cycle of damage becomes fully apparent.

    Jim, I am not talking about shooting innocent men because I got stood up for the prom or some such "minor long ago incident". I am talking about what sexual abuse does to a person, and how the betrayal, anger, hurt, and self-loathing can make one feel like they want to exact revenge on their abuser.

  15. oh my god! i've had the same thing happen to me. (as has every teenage girl in a city, i think!) i was about 13, walking to the bus stop and this sick piece of shit started asking me the time, and pulling his dick out of his pants and i was so horrified that i ran for my life, crying all the time.

    i felt so bad then...

    i feel so bad now, thinking about that innocent 13 year old, thinking its her fault.

    enough book reading, net surfing and oprah watching has taught me that its not about the sex. its about weilding your power over someone weaker and feeling good about yourself.

  16. Jim: Exposing ones genitial to a 15 year old girl on the street is sexual assault, it is not a minor incident. It was very damaging to me, that I gave directions to a sranger in kindness and was repaid with a perverted power trip.

    jege: Your anger is justified. I'm sure most people understood your comment for what it was: venting at what can feel like a powerless situation.

    pink: I have had a few such incidences happen to me and the most soul destroying aspect is the question one asks oneself, "What is it about ME that attracts this kind of thing?" It is not until we really believe that it is the other person with the defect that we can begin to heal.

  17. I honestly don't understand why flashers find what they do so bloody exciting. I mean, rape and molestation - these are things that I can at least see the point of (without condoning them, obviously).

    But shaking your dick at someone?

    That said, if one gay man shakes his dick at another gay man it's called an invitation :-p

  18. jay: Is it like shaking hands?