Wednesday, July 01, 2015

let's keep the cray cray in our heads

~ click image to make biggerer ~

We are people. We are individuals. We are going to disagree. But why do we have to do it so violently. And I’m not talking about physical altercations.

I like diversity. It makes life interesting. I like words. They are the basis of our perceptions and reality. Nothing is real until we name it. So words matter.

I guess people haven’t see the movie, Bambi. "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all." ~ Thumper
We seem to think it’s ok to hurl insults and death threats at people we don’t like or people who disagree with us. Anyone that is different is open for target practice. There’s nothing more annoying or self-defeating as conversations that deteriorate into hate and threats. People can’t hear each other when we do this. You completely invalidate and devalue yourself and your arguments when you do this.  

You become a small person and a part of the lunatic fringe.

Yes, you can control your emotions. Take a deep breath. Don’t hit the send button. Would you act this way if the person was standing right in front of you, just the two of you alone? It’s not likely. And if you would, I’d suggest seeking out a good mental health professional.

As soon as someone starts yelling and spouting abuse, my ears stopping working, my brain shuts down and I envision corks being shoved in orifices. He may have something important to share but I don’t give a shit because he’s become unhinged. I can’t take someone with so little self control seriously.

Just because you have free speech doesn’t mean every thought in your brain should come out of your mouth or off of your finger tips.

You don’t make yourself bigger by devaluing someone else.

I couldn’t have a conversation about the pizza owners who wouldn’t cater a gay wedding because I had to listen to the whining about the death threats they had to endure. The important questions got ignored because of all of the hate being flung around. We can’t discuss the nature of marriage, civil rights, what constitutes deeply held beliefs or the fact that religious ceremonies aren’t catered affairs (the party afterwards is catered not the ceremony.)

The important questions that the popularity of the Grey books bring up can’t be discussed because of all of the negative tweeting which smacks heavily of jealousy. Do you feel all superior now because you could hurl clever insults at the author all over the internets? Lovely. We can’t discuss abusive relationships, just why these stories are so popular, the qualities of compelling story or what makes good writing good.

When you hurl insults or make threats, you cover up the craziness expressed by others. You dilute their wacky behavior so they can hide, there is no more light and dark. You can’t take the moral high ground. You’ve given up your position on the pedestal. I ignore you because you are just as cray-cray as everyone else. You’ve become boring and inconsequential and trite.


  1. I am agree on discussions of issues like gay marriage, civil rights and so on - becoming hateful only gets in the way of a conversation. And death threats are of course never EVER okay. As for the tweets about 50 shades, I think when someone profits off writing a book eroticizing rape and abuse, I can't really muster up any sympathy for the author. None of the tweets I read seemed mean, just direct.

    1. I don't feel sorry for ELJ. She's rich, famous and popular and I agree most remarks weren't that bad. Most were quite clever and funny but that's all we're talking about.

      Sometimes I think I should read the books to keep up on current events but the excerpts I've read just make me cringe and I can't do it.

  2. I think that one can write a review--even a scathing one--without attacking a person as a human being. Fifty Shades of Gray is patently awful. My son and I were laughing uproariously over some of the excerpts. He said he thought the whole thing was a joke and was shocked when he found out it was serious.
    Dreadful though I think the book is, there is no reason on this planet to threaten the life of the person who wrote it or attack her humanity. Some people take things too far.