Sound reaches my ears through serous waves. I feel the vibrations more than I hear people talking. The words reach me as a dull hum that envelops me in a surreal haze. I wonder throughout the day if I am awake or if I am floating through a déjà vu experience; my elbows tingle, the skin on my lips comes alive as I breathe and my cheeks pulse with heat.
The juxtaposition of sensations makes me nauseous. I walk the landscape of an Escher drawing, spiraling in a topsy turvy world where up and down dance in confused order. My body disconnects from my mind and soul, the tenuous plasma chord which usually keeps me whole streaming off to nothingness. The realities I normally keep compartmentalized switch places and blend like crayon shavings melting on a piece of paper held over a light bulb.
My solar plexus throbs matching my racing heart beat. My eyes do not exist. My lungs constrict, tighten, full of phlegm. My mouth tastes of ozone, a dry thunderstorm brewing behind my teeth.
I want to close my eyes, to sleep, to dream, to be in a place more fully realized than this humid swamp I wade through.