Monday, June 06, 2011

The Scaredy-cat is Back

It has been suggested to me that I should stop hiding when shit happens. Allow me a moment to whine, “I don’t wanna!”

I’m not really over the urge to whine, but I shall move on.

Life has reached a point of relative plateau.

I am only considering the non-hiding bit because I don’t get much done except the basics of survival and once the crisisses subside I regret the lack of accomplishment in areas that are strictly for me. But damn, I get tired. (And you thought I was done whining.)

So, anyway.

Since I was last here over a month ago, the two biggies:

My husband (QV) was laid off. His company shut down the division for which he worked.

Two weeks later, he had a stroke.

Both “disasters” turned out not to be as horrendous as they sound.

The most important part is that QV (who is only 50) was very lucky in that the effects of the stroke were bizarre but minimal and should not affect his future abilities. We just have to go through the process of having him cleared by a bucket load of doctors. The stroke high-lighted a weak heart as the cause.

We have radically changed our life-styles and we will end up being healthier than before. That’s definitely a good thing.

I don’t much like talking about this kind of stuff (to my mother’s eternal dismay) but I feel guilty about my disappearing acts. I know other people have “stuff” to deal with, too, but I don’t handle stress well. I’ve always required lots of alone time and the need is greater when I have to marshall energy for these lovely little surprises that are thrown our way to help us grow. (I’m laughing hysterically over that last phrase. Are you?)

Merry Meet and Blessed Be


  1. Sending healing thoughts in his direction and loads of support for the both of you as you navigate these life-changes.

    It will not be simple
    It will not take long
    It will take all your breath.

  2. thanks for the heads up nessa...sorry that life has been a twist here of late, but i am glad you can see a silver lining in each or a way at least to navigate...prayers

  3. Nessa...your post is very relatable. I'm a hider, too, especially when life gets overwhelming. I'm working diligently on changing that. I'm glad QV is on the mend and I will send prayers and good wishes your way.

  4. That isn't hiding, those are really harsh things. I'm wishing you and your husband well.
    There are those who say I'm too open with my shiz, which is probably why I scare everyone away! You can't win!

  5. I think you do whatever you need to to get through things. That's not hiding. I certainly take breaks when I don't feel like sorting through on-line whatever is going on in my life.

  6. Vanessa Kilmer...!!!!!
    Say.....That would make a GREAT 55!
    Some people miss you ya know....G

  7. I'm so glad your husband is ok, I completely understand the alone time ... and your energy should be directed where it's needed right now ... we'll all be here whenever you pop into blogdem x

  8. Whoa! And here I was thinking you were too productive, busy and happy to have time to blog. I am sorry that wasn't the case. I have said prayers for you and V asking God to heal you physically, financially, and emotionally.

  9. Wow, that is a load of "little surprises." Those are the kind of things that make me feel very content with normal and a little boring.
    I hope things are moving in a more positive direction. I fully understand the need to disappear and regroup.

  10. Wow Nessa, that was a lot to deal with. No wonder you went AWOL. Sending prayers your way.

  11. I've missed you girl! Glad you are back. I'm keeping you in my prayers!

  12. That's a lot to cope with. You've done extraordinarily well in the way you've responded.

  13. You have every right to whine. Whitesnake and I are sending you healthy and happy vibes.

  14. Wow. Healing blessings to both of you. I would also hide.

  15. Whining seems natural under the circumstances. I hope that your husband makes steady progress.

    Life throwing things at us and that does sound a good description of how it seems to be at times.......I'm no good at stress either but somehow or other we get through.
    It really does help to write things down though.
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

  16. here's hoping there is healing and calm in your silence.

    Best wishes!

  17. Oh Golly Nessa, I wasn't expecting this! Neither were you guys. So hide as you wish, I would.

    Here is wishing and praying for the best for both of you. I'll check in sooner next time in hopes of an update.

  18. Thanks for the heads up, that's fantastic!